Guarding Antonia Page 7

  The tension leeched out of him and she lifted her head to see that he appeared to have fallen back asleep. His brow had smoothed out and so had his breathing. When she went to move, his arms tightened.

  Okay then, he wasn’t going to let her go, and if she was being honest with herself, she didn’t want to move from his embrace. A yawn wracked her body and her eyelids grew heavy. She’d rest her eyes for a moment, let him fall into a deeper sleep then she’d move so they both could sleep more comfortably.

  Yes, that was a good plan.

  The faint ringing of a phone interrupted Antonia’s sleep. She blinked a couple of times, before closing her eyes again, reaching out to see if her phone was on the side table.

  Her hand connected with the hard planes of flesh instead. Before she could move, a large warm hand closed over hers, locking it into place.

  “They’ll call back if it’s important.” A sexy, gruff sleep-laden voice grumbled beside her.

  Robot.

  Clearly, he recognized her ring tone. She imagined if it was his phone, he’d have sprung out of bed at the first sound.

  She opened her eyes to find his head turned to the side, watching her closely. “Morning,” she mumbled.

  “Morning. How did you sleep? Any dreams?”

  Antonia propped herself up on her elbow, finding his question interesting, considering it had been he who had the dreams and not she.

  Did he not remember his nightmare?

  His desperation at finding her beside him and not lost to him?

  He really didn’t recall?

  “No. No dreams,” she said cautiously. “How did you sleep? Did you have any dreams?”

  A flash of emotion flared in his eyes and his gaze darted away from hers. “No. No dreams.”

  Hmm, interesting, trying to avoid acknowledging he’d had a nightmare—typical male. Never wanting to admit he was vulnerable. Especially when he was Navy SEAL, the toughest of the toughest. No doubt, in his mind, he wasn’t allowed to show any weakness.

  He loosened his hold on her hand and she tapped her fingers on his warm, bare chest. “I think you lie, Brendan “Robot” Dean.”

  A sigh rippled through him, and she held her breath, waiting to see what he did next.

  “Why do you say that?” he asked cautiously.

  Did she push it? In her mind, it was clear he recalled having the dream, but he didn’t want to talk about it. For some reason that cut deep. If the roles were reversed, he’d expect her to talk about it and share it with him. Why couldn’t he do that with her?

  On the other hand, did she want to start the day out with an argument? Because if she pushed him on the subject, a disagreement between them was as likely as the sun rising in the east. Wanting to keep the unlikely peace that had sprung up between them, she let it go. “No reason.” She tossed the covers back and scooted out of the bed. “I’m going to take a shower. I need to go back to my place and get ready for work.”

  “Do you think it’s wise to go back after yesterday?”

  She placed her hands on her hips, trying to ignore his autocratic tone. “Are you talking about my apartment or work?”

  “Both.”

  “I can’t take any more time off work and I’m not going to let some loser keep me away from my apartment.”

  “That loser is a murderer,” he responded drily.

  Like she needed reminding, she didn’t think she’d ever forget the glint of sunlight on the blade. But she’d meant what she’d said. That guy wasn’t going to keep out of her home. Plus, she wanted to put space between her and Robot. Sleeping beside him had been wonderful and she hadn’t missed his morning erection. A normal male reaction, but feeling the hard length of him against her thigh had caused a million memories to bombard her brain. Being strong and not succumbing to the temptation that was Brendan Dean was proving harder than she’d like to admit.

  “I don’t need reminding what he is. And you don’t get any say in what I do. I’m going to shower, and when I’m dressed, you’re going to drive me home then I’m going to work.” She glanced at the clock on the side table. “Shouldn’t you be at PT now? You mentioned last night you were going to give Carlos a hard time about the t-shirt.”

  He shrugged. “Yeah, I was, but I’m not now. The guys won’t expect me and I’m sure Italy filled them all in on what happened. I’ll do double tomorrow and make Italy do triple.”

  Somehow, she didn’t doubt his words about doing twice as much tomorrow to make up for what he missed this morning. She chewed her bottom lip as another thought hit her. “I forgot everyone knows we’re married.”

  “Yep.”

  His one word response was very helpful—not. “I guess they’ll have to get used to the idea that we won’t be married for long. I’ll call a lawyer today to see what we can do about getting an annulment…or whatever we may need to do now seeing as it’s been a couple of years since the initial marriage.”

  Robot’s lips firmed. “We’ll sort that out later. My priority is ensuring your safety.”

  God dammit why did she have to bring up their marriage again? If she hadn’t mentioned it, he probably wouldn’t have gone all alpha male on her.

  Life had become too complicated for her to face at the moment. “Whatever, but I am going home, and I am going to work. If you choose not to drive me home then that’s fine, I’ll arrange an Uber.” She lifted her chin, gathering up her clothes and letting him know the discussion was over as far as she was concerned.

  “Fine. You win.”

  His lips continued to move, but she couldn’t make out what he said. She had a feeling it was this time.

  Whether it was a one off victory or a final one, she wasn’t going to argue. Once she got home, everything would make sense and she could deal with whatever was going to happen next.

  The second the door clicked shut to his ensuite bathroom, Robot tossed the covers back and slung his legs over the side of the bed, fingers digging into his thighs as his head hung low.

  Memories of his dream still lingered in his mind when Antonia’s phone woke them. Even now, his breathing became ragged and his heartbeat kicked up a notch or two.

  The sound of the water running in the bathroom reassured him that Antonia was safe in his house, but in his dream she’d been taken from him. Kidnapped by a faceless man. When he and the team had found them, the guy’s features had transformed into Bryan, Erin’s ex-mob boyfriend. He’d smiled evilly as he glared at Robot then shot Antonia in the head.

  Agitation built in him and he jumped up from the bed and raced down to his home gym in the basement and slammed his fists repeatedly into the punching bag. He didn’t know how long he’d been at it, but when the red haze finally lifted, his body was drenched with sweat and his knuckles were bright red.

  “Do you feel better now?”

  He whirled around and saw Antonia standing at the top of the stairs, wearing black leggings and an oversized sweater. She looked casually sexy and if he didn’t stink to high-heaven he’d drag her body close and lose the lingering fear buried deep in her body.

  “How long have you been there?” he asked as he walked over to the small stack of towels. Picking one up, he wiped it over his face and body.

  “Long enough to know that was some demon you were fighting. Want to talk about it?”

  Robot knew Antonia was referring to the nightmare. She’d eluded to knowing about it this morning and he now remembered waking up and kissing her senseless. But telling her the details wasn’t going to happen. She had enough on her plate as it was without having to listen to him.

  “Nope.” He dropped the towel in the small hamper and strode toward the stairs. “Give me ten minutes and we’ll be out of here.”

  He brushed past her, knowing it was rude and his asshole scale was hitting ten, but he didn’t care. Maybe Antonia was right. Maybe they should end this marriage and go about their lives as if it had never happened.

  He choked on the thought of not having Anto
nia in his life. If only he hadn’t had that dream last night, then he wouldn’t feel this need to lock her away in his house to keep her safe and away from danger.

  Shucking his shorts, he strode into the bathroom, flicked the water on and stood under the spray. The cold water stung like a million pinpricks, but he welcomed the sensation. It reminded him of freezing his ass off in the Pacific Ocean as rain pelted him and his team while wave after wave crashed over them during BUD/s training.

  There was a reason he’d remained single for most of his life. Relationships were complicated enough, but factor in his job, and it was near impossible to sustain one.

  If he had to do it, he’d give Antonia whatever she wanted, an annulment or a divorce. When she found someone else and brought him around the team get-togethers, he’d face it like the sailor he was.

  Letting her go would be the best thing for all of them.

  Mind made up he turned the dial to hot and soaped himself up, ignoring the ache in the region of his heart.

  Chapter 7

  Ever since she’d spoken to him in his basement, where he’d been pummeling the shit out of a punching bag, Robot had been unusually quiet. What was even more disturbing was the fact that he hadn’t even attempted to touch her.

  He’d opened doors for her, but he didn’t put his hand on the small of her back or touch her cheek like he usually did. Instead, he’d remained resolute and kept his gaze fixed out the windshield.

  Any time she’d tried to start a conversation he’d responded with a grunt so she’d given up on that, too.

  Now they were only a couple of miles from her apartment and nerves fired up inside her like dry grass when struck with a match. She clasped her fingers together to prevent them from shaking.

  I can do this.

  I can do this.

  She kept chanting the mantra in her mind as they drove into the complex. Robot rolled down his window and entered the combination to open the gate. As the long metal structure lumbered open, Antonia fought the desire to blurt out that she wanted to go back to Robot’s place. A place where she’d felt safe and secure. Any feelings of security she’d had living in her complex died the second she’d witnessed the murder and she didn’t realize that fully until this moment. She hadn’t expected to feel a fear so intense she thought she was going to throw up.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, and she almost celebrated he’d done more than grunt at her.

  If she told him she couldn’t do this he’d take her back to his place, no questions asked. If it had been the before-the-shower-Robot sitting beside her and not the after-shower-Robot she’d do it. She’d let him know her fears and ask for him to protect her.

  Summoning up courage she really didn’t feel, she faced him. “I’m fine. Anxious to get to my place. I know that once I’m around my own things, everything will return to normal.”

  Yeah, keep telling yourself over and over and eventually you might believe it.

  That voice really needed to go on a long vacation.

  Robot pulled into the visitor’s spot assigned to her apartment and switched the car off. “I can take you to Erin’s if you want. I know she wouldn’t mind if you stayed there a few days.”

  Wow, what the hell had happened to him in the shower? If she didn’t know better, she’d swear that the Robot she’d slept next to, the one who’d clung to her tightly after his dream…

  The dream.

  Could it be? Had he remembered he’d dreamt something bad had happened to her. Did he think by putting distance between them that it would keep her safe?

  Why the hell was she mentally arguing with herself about it. She was getting what she wanted, space from the man. She should be ecstatic about it all.

  If the circumstances had been different, then, yeah, she’d be happy. But, as much as she hated to admit it, she needed him.

  “I’m surprised you’d palm me off to Erin when last night you were determined to keep me close to you.”

  He shifted in his seat. “That was last night. Now do you want me to walk you up or are you happy to go up yourself?”

  His change of attitude was like a punch to the stomach and a puff of breath burst out of her. This was why she didn’t believe in love. “Nice to see you back, the Robot I know so well. And no, I don’t need you to see me up to my place. I can do it myself.” She opened the door and got out, turning to lean down and look back at him. He still sat rigid in his chair, his expression blank. “I’ll get in touch with a lawyer. The sooner this marriage is over the better. Bye Brendan.”

  Antonia slammed the door and hurried away, not wanting him to see the tears that welled up in her eyes.

  The sound of a car door shutting vaguely registered, but her focus was getting to her apartment as soon as possible. She reached the stairs that would take her up to the second floor when an arm hooked around her waist and lifted her off her feet. She yelped and latched onto the only solid thing she could find as she was whirled around—Robot’s shoulders.

  “T, I’m so sorry.” He buried his face into her neck. “You’re right, I’m being an asshole.”

  Without giving her a chance to respond, his lips found hers and she melted into his embrace. Her response to his touch was automatic, when she should’ve pushed him away. But she needed this connection with him. At this moment in time knowing Robot was her husband and there when she needed him comforted her more than she wanted to admit.

  His lips trailed a line along her jaw until he reached her ear. “I shouldn’t have pushed you away.”

  “Yeah, why did you? You’ve been doing nothing but pull me toward you. If anyone should’ve been pushing anyone away, it should’ve been me.”

  He ran a hand over his head. “I know. We need to talk, but not here?”

  Robot slipped an arm around her waist and together they walked up to her apartment. She didn’t fight him when he took the keys from her. There was no point, this was a SEAL thing he and the rest of the guys did. Erin had groused about it just after she moved in with Carlos, secretly though Antonia suspected she loved it. Brielle relayed a similar story.

  Standing so close to him, she couldn’t miss the tensing of his muscles as he flung the door open. “What’s wrong?” she whispered and tried to look around his broad shoulders.

  “Nothing. Stay behind me while I check the place out.”

  At least he didn’t tell her to wait outside. As they made their way through her apartment, she felt like she was in a bad detective movie.

  “This is probably totally unnecessary. The lock didn’t show any signs of forced entry.”

  “You can never be too careful. You have outside access, they could’ve come in through the sliding door and you’d never know.”

  That wasn’t very comforting, she hadn’t thought about being vulnerable because of her balcony. She supposed he had a point to check it out, not that she’d admit that to him.

  “All clear,” he said unnecessarily when they returned to the living room.

  “Well, that’s a relief,” she returned barely keeping the sarcasm out of her tone.

  He turned. “Yeah it is.”

  Okay, he was back to being semi-assholeish, not that she didn’t deserve it, she wasn’t exactly being friendly.

  “I’ve fifteen minutes before I have to leave and go to work. Do you want to explain what all that was downstairs?”

  He sighed and in that short huff of breath she could hear a wealth of frustration. How did he do that?

  She’d love to have that ability when some of her workmates annoyed her. Not that it happened often. She loved her job and was lucky to have found it so quickly after moving to Virginia. Part of her wondered if the mysterious Tex, who’d helped the team find her and Erin when Bryan and taken them, had helped her somehow. Apparently, the man could work miracles, but she didn’t think he was that good in enabling her to get her job.

  Silence stretched between them and her tension level inched up the scale until it was getting close to b
eing in the red zone.

  “Time’s a wastin’, Robot. Start talking or…” The rest of her sentence lodged in her throat when his hands curled over her shoulders. He moved faster than a gazelle fleeing a lion.

  “Or what?”

  Her insides melted at the authority of his tone. The man infuriated and turned her on all at the same time. How did he do that?

  “I’ll kick you out?” Way to sound confident and strong.

  He chuckled and pulled her close until he held her loosely in his embrace. “Are you saying you’ll do it or asking if you can?”

  “Semantics.” She fluttered her hand in the air.

  Another puff of air tickled her neck and he dragged over to the couch with him. “I, um.” He paused. “Well, I...” He stopped again.

  Antonia disentangled herself from his hold and put some distance between them on the couch. “Is it really this hard to talk to me, Robot? I am your wife, you know.”

  If he wasn’t speechless before, he was definitely speechless now and it was almost comical the way his eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. An instant later he’d gathered his composure and the glimpse of a man she was sure no one ever saw, disappeared. “Do you know that’s the first time you’ve said you’re my wife?”

  She allowed herself a small grin. “It looks like it unlocked the speaker’s block you were having. So, how about you ride that pony all the way home.”

  “Where the hell are you getting these analogies from?”

  She shrugged. Words were popping in her mind and she was blurting them out. Not something she normally did. It was common knowledge among the group that she had a blunt tongue, pointing out what others mentally thought but were too polite to say.

  “You’re still avoiding the subject.”

  “Fine.” He shot up from the couch and began pacing around her small living room. “I had a dream you were taken and sh—I didn’t like it.”

  She gathered that much from his cries when he’d been in the throes of his dream. But had he been about to say that she’d been shot? A shiver rippled down her spine at the thought. When Bryan had taken her and Erin, he’d held them both at gunpoint and it had been the most frightening thing she’d ever experienced. One she didn’t what to ever have again.